Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
