Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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