he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize