Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
try to milk me bitch
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