if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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