He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
