im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
