I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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