the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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