I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
