it's like iHOP with fire
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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