Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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