So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
