How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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