you win again, gameday.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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