Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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