Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
