garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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