Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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