I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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