I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
