Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I think pants incapable of making pants work
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
