3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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