Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
