I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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