Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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