Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
