with your own penis?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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