As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
