She went from zero to smokin in five shots
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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