did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
