Where did you get a picture of my penis
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
