If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
