I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching her eat just hurts me
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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