she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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