Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
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