she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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