i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
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