She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
