the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
