We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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