You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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