Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
