Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
