he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
