can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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