I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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