Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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