I feel like I'm in dance class right now
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
