shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
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he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
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nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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