Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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